My name is Jesse. I am a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist. I am a wife, a mom of three, a daughter, a sister, a friend and a human who is trying to figure out life!
It's kind of my motto. In marriage, and in life. It started with a ring...
I'm just getting started, but here's what I am thinking so far...
Hi! I am so glad you're here. My name is Jesse.
I initially started this website as a blog to explore my time as a stay at home mom. HOWEVER! I recently decided that I would return to direct client care! I am going to see clients on a very part time basis, and really hone into my niche of couples and individuals at a transitional point in their life. So please read if you'd like! If you're interested in scheduling an appointment for therapy with me, please also feel free to reach out for that!
You may be asking, what does that mean?! Essentially, I love working with couples and individuals who are adjusting to a new season of life. Whether that means adjusting to a new marriage, a new baby, infertility/family planning, children leaving for college, a divorce, a new career, a new stage in a long term relationship, etc. Changes in life really impact us as individuals and couples and I think that it is so important to have support through these times.
I have always wanted to write a book, but I am not quite organized enough to do so. I also have wanted to start a podcast, because every podcast I find that talks about couples and marriage tends to have a religious lean to it, and that isn't necessarily my style. So here I am. I am going to utilize this blog to discuss some of the lessons I have learned, both professionally & personally (there is a lot of crossover!) and also give an inside look into the life of a therapist, mom, wife and human. I am fully prepared for zero people to read it, and I am okay with that; I am mostly utilizing this as a journey to explore myself and my knowledge, regain some of my own passion and maybe help some people along the way.
In this world of social media and online presence, I think it is so important to maintain connection with other humans. Please reach out, I would love to talk with you. I also would be happy to get you scheduled for couples or individual therapy sessions (currently providing online sessions only, and can only do so if you are in North Carolina).
DISCLAIMER: It's probably important to mention-I am going to be really real on here. I am not going to sugarcoat things, and I am going to try to be as transparent as possible (while still protecting my people and their privacy). I also tend to use sailor-type language sometimes, so if you're here for the raw stuff and the occasional (or frequent!) colorful word, let's do this! In the nature of compassion, I will try to put trigger warnings on some of the posts that I know may trigger some people-but please keep in mind that no one can be aware of what is effecting you besides yourself, please take care of you.
You are welcome to keep coming back here to see new content. However, a better option is to subscribe to my newsletter! You will get updates on new posts when they become available, and there may be more perks coming!
I do. Today & Everyday. is kind of my life motto. It started with a ring...
I've never been much of a romantic. Don't get me wrong, I love a RomCom as much as the next girl, but I also roll my eyes quite frequently when watching them. I love my husband dearly and I truly believe that something bigger than us brought us together. But also, there are a lot of people in the world...like billions-it doesn't work with my logical brain for me to think he is the only one of those billions who I could have a happy and fulfilling relationship and life with.
I have always felt that love is a verb, and it takes a lot of work. My parents have always fostered that in me, as they are an awesome example of working on a marriage regularly, even when shit gets hard. Before my husband was my husband, I would tell him all the time that I cannot STAND "two become one"; I said when we got married I would make the officiant say "two remained two whole individuals who happened to decide they like each other and want to do life together". I will go into this further later, as a lot of our wedding ceremony surrounded this idea. But, I always told my husband that I think love and marriage and really any relationship is a conscious choice-every single day. I believe you have to wake up and decide you want to do the things-you have to decide to be a present mom, be a supportive and loving partner, be a great friend, etc. It is exhausting and overwhelming at times, but I don't believe any of that is passive. I made this abundantly clear to my husband when we were dating and preached about it regularly.
When we got married, we decided we would have each other's wedding band inscribed with a message to one another (cue the "awwws"). On our wedding day, we looked at our bands and laughed. We both put the SAME THING in each other's ring. You guessed it-"Soulmates!" Just kidding-they both said "I do. Today and Everyday." We wake up everyday and decide to love one another and be in a partnership.
Since then, I have really grown with this concept. I have utilized it to find strength and to decrease anxiety about several situations. I have thought about it sometimes in different ways, like "I only have to do this today", "I will do this today", "I will focus on only today", "Here is my goal for today". I have applied this concept to my career, my relationships, my parenting, weight loss and health, all the things! So it only felt natural for this blog to have this name. And much to my surprise and delight, the domain was available!
The logo is a circle to signify that ring. And the wave signifies the ups and downs and tides of life. I also grew up and currently live by the ocean (lucky me!) and have always felt so much serenity and peace through the ocean. I quite literally believe that saltwater heals everything.
Life.
That's really the only answer I have. I will be pulling a lot from my education and experience as a therapist in an effort to try to help anyone who may read it. My professional experience ranges from working with kids, to individuals, to couples. Couples work is really where my passion lies, and I likely will blog a lot about relationships. I plan to be incredibly transparent (don't worry, I got my husband's permission) and not to come from a place of knowing or doing it right, because that is certainly not the case. Instead, I hope to relate to others, explore with others, and also process my own stuff.
I plan to explore motherhood, as I am a mama through and through. I love my little people so much and I spend a whole lot of time with them. Motherhood has been an interesting hood for me-it is something I have always wanted, worked really hard to get, enjoy immensely, and it also stresses me the hell out. I have high standards for myself and my kids and I question myself every minute of every day. I have a lot of technical knowledge about child development and relationship building, attachment styles, parenting styles, discipline styles, and fostering emotionally healthy tiny humans-but that unfortunately doesn't always cross over to how I actually do things. I also think in this day and age where we are inundated with information and advice, the "shoulds" and "shouldn'ts" can be paralyzing. Maybe we can wade through some of that.
I also plan to talk about mental health-because it is so important and I am really passionate about it. I never really considered mental health as a "thing" growing up-that could be because I grew up in the 90s, or it could be just the culture of the family and people I grew up around. Regardless, I have learned a lot through my career in mental health and have really been able to hone in on my own mental health and recognize some issues that have been there for my whole life that I always thought were just personality characteristics or flaws. I also have learned, taught and utilized lots of mental health techniques over the years that could be helpful to others.
I plan to have a different topic for each post and explore my own feelings and experiences with that topic, as well as throw in some tips & tricks I have gained in my therapy education and career!
So if you're a human, hopefully there will be something here for you. If you're a human who is in some sort of relationship with other humans, there will definitely be something here for you. I hope you stick around!
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